Psychology Tips Featured

Why Do We Miss Our Stops? Psych Explained

Discover the surprising psychology behind missing our stops and how to stay more present during your daily commute.

Mrs Berk

04 Aug 2025 • 5 min read

Picture this: You step onto the escalator, heading up to the train platform. The familiar whoosh of the arriving train greets you. The doors open, cool air rushes out—but instead of hurrying to board, you stroll past and sit on a bench, watching the train leave without you. Why did you let it go? Let’s dive into the fascinating psychology behind why we sometimes miss our stops (or trains) and what it reveals about our minds.

A Personal Confession: "Why Did I Stay?"

Let me share a story: one evening on my way home after work, I was on the bus scrolling through my phone when I looked up and saw my stop—the one right outside my estate! The doors opened with their signature ding, but instead of standing up and leaving, I stayed seated and continued scrolling. Why?! Missing that stop meant walking back from the next one—a longer route home! It wasn’t laziness; it just… happened.

Sometimes our actions defy logic because they’re driven by subtle psychological forces like habit or avoidance rather than clear reasoning. And honestly? Even when we don’t understand ourselves fully, we still repeat these behaviors.

The Procrastination Puzzle: "I'll Get Off… Later"

Procrastination is a big player here. It's not just about putting off work or chores—it can sneak into everyday decisions like getting off public transport. According to emotion-regulation theory, procrastination happens when we prioritize short-term comfort over long-term benefits. Staying seated feels easier in the moment than standing up, gathering your things, and stepping into the bustling world outside.

But here's the kicker: missing your stop often creates more work. You’ll have to walk back from the next stop or wait for another train heading in the opposite direction. So why do we do it?

As Gloria Pitzer cheekily put it, “Procrastination is my sin. It brings me naught but sorrow. I know that I should stop it. In fact, I will… tomorrow!”

Comfort Zone Conundrum: "This Seat Is Too Good to Leave"

Public transport can be chaotic—crowds, noise, and constant movement. When you finally find a seat or a comfortable spot to stand, it can feel like an oasis of calm in an otherwise stressful commute. Leaving that comfort zone is hard! This ties into short-term mood prioritization, where we choose immediate comfort (staying seated) over long-term benefits (getting closer to our destination).

For example, imagine you're on a train after a long day at work. You’re tired, your favorite podcast is playing, and the thought of getting off feels like too much effort—even though you know staying on means more hassle later.

Herd Mentality: "If They’re Staying On, So Am I"

Ever noticed how you’re more likely to follow what others are doing on public transport? This is herd mentality at work—a psychological phenomenon where we mimic the behavior of those around us. If everyone else stays seated as your stop approaches, you might unconsciously assume it's not time to get off yet.

In fact, research shows that social norms heavily influence travel decisions. Descriptive norms (what others are doing) and injunctive norms (what others approve of) shape our behavior without us even realizing it. So if the crowd stays put, you might stay put too—even if it doesn’t serve your personal goals.

Decision-Making Theories at Play

Our choices on public transport aren’t just random—they’re shaped by psychological frameworks:

Theory of Planned Behavior (TPB): This model emphasizes rational decision-making, suggesting that behavior is influenced by attitudes (positive or negative feelings toward the behavior), subjective norms (social pressure), and perceived behavioral control (the ease or difficulty of performing the behavior). In the context of missing stops, TPB might suggest that if you perceive getting off as inconvenient or if others around you are staying on, you're more likely to stay seated.

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TPB: Imagine you're at a restaurant deciding what to order. You weigh the pros and cons of each dish, consider what others might think, and think about how easy it is to get what you want. That's basically what TPB says happens when we make decisions. For missing stops, it means if you think getting off is a hassle, or if everyone else is staying on, you're more likely to stay seated too.

Norm Activation Model (NAM): NAM focuses on altruistic and pro-environmental behaviors, highlighting personal norms (PN) as a key driver of behavior. While NAM is more commonly applied to behaviors like reducing car use for environmental reasons, it can also help explain why some people might feel a moral obligation to use public transport efficiently—though this might not directly influence missing stops.

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NAM: This model is all about doing good for others. While it might not directly explain missing stops, it shows how we might feel morally obligated to use public transport efficiently. It's like choosing to walk instead of drive to help the environment—except in this case, it's about using public transport wisely.

Tips for Getting Off On Time

If you find yourself missing stops more often than you'd like, here are some practical strategies:

Set Alarms: Use your phone to set an alarm or notification for when your stop is approaching.
Stay Mindful: Avoid getting too engrossed in distractions like your phone as your stop nears.
Visual Cues: Keep an eye out for landmarks or station names so you’re aware of where you are.
Plan Ahead: Familiarize yourself with your route so you know when to prepare to get off.
Reward Yourself: Treat yourself for successfully staying alert and getting off at the right stop—it helps reinforce good habits!

Takeaway

Missing stops isn’t just about laziness or forgetfulness—it’s a mix of psychological quirks like procrastination, comfort-seeking, social influence, and decision-making biases. Understanding these factors can help us make better choices—not just on public transport but in life.

As Jim Rohn wisely said, “You cannot make progress without making decisions.” So next time you’re tempted to stay seated as your stop approaches, remember this blog post—and take that step toward progress (literally)!

This version integrates the differences between NAM and TPB into your psychology blog post, providing a deeper understanding of the psychological factors influencing our behavior on public transport.

References

Ajzen, I. (1985). From intentions to actions: A theory of planned behavior. In J. Kuhl & J. Beckmann (Eds.), Action-control: From cognition to behavior (pp. 11-39). Springer. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_planned_behavior

Bytamar, J. M., Choi, E., & Vanti, M. (2020). Emotion regulation difficulties and academic procrastination. Frontiers in Psychology, 11, 524588. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.524588 1

Sirois, F. M., & Pychyl, T. A. (2013). Procrastination and the priority of short-term mood regulation: Consequences for future self. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 7(2), 115–127. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10049005/ 2

Savari, M., Gharechaee, H., & Jafari, H. (2023). Integrating the norm activation model and theory of planned behavior to explain pro-environmental behavior intentions. Scientific Reports, 13(1), 1111. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10076272/ 3

Schwartz, S. H. (1977). Normative influences on altruism. In L. Berkowitz (Ed.), Advances in experimental social psychology (Vol. 10, pp. 221-279). Academic Press. https://scholars.hkbu.edu.hk/en/publications/the-norm-activation-model-an-exploration-of-the-functions-of-anti-2 4

Cialdini, R. B., Kallgren, C. A., & Reno, R. R. (1990). A focus theory of normative conduct: Recycling the concept of norms to reduce littering in public places. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 58(6), 1015-1026. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2431131/ 5

Asch, S. E. (1956). Studies of independence and conformity: A minority of one against a unanimous majority. Psychological Monographs: General and Applied, 70(9), 1–70. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herd_mentality